Who doesn’t friggin like Zooey Deschanel?
If you don’t like her, stop following my blog. I’m serious. (No, I’m playing I need you. Like no, I’m not desperate or anything… like well I don’t need, need you like that…please don’t go…)
I would be all about her and Tina Fey doing a show together where they are sisters. I don’t care about the premise, they just need to be together and they need to be related. It would be too hilarious and wonderful. I’d tune in every week and I’d probably get every season on DVD.
I love Zooey Deschanel for the same reason I love Tina Fey. They are quirky and unapologetically brilliant. They rep for awkward girls (much love to my favorite awkward girl Issa Rae!). I love the characters they play (Jess-The New Girl/ Liz Lemon-30 Rock). They are sarcastic. They sometimes care too much about people, they are ridiculously creative. They are not afraid of being silly. They poke fun at trying to be stereotypically sexy which makes them even more refreshing. Even when they make epic mistakes, it’s funny. When they attempt to fix said mistakes and make things worse before solving the problem at the half-hour’s end, it’s even more funny.
Their relationships are usually disaster-ridden.
They even take on racial faux pas with their black friends on their shows and do so with such dexterity and honesty. They manage to do it with a one-liner that’s so quick, you almost miss it because you are still howling. Their black friends may just deadpan, “Don’t ever do that again.”
Side note: Which reminds me, I’m going to have to do a post about best television black friends who keep it real (recognize race and racially awkward things, speak on it and move on) on predominately white shows. (Damon Wayans Jr. /Happy Endings, Wanda Sykes/The New Adventures of Old Christine, Dude from King of Queens, Dude from the New Girl, Skills from One Tree Hill, Tracy Morgan and his entire entourage on 30 Rock)
Tina and Zooey often break into funny, goofy dances and voices. I totally do that.
They get screwed over and have really suckie days, but they get over them and keep going. I do that too.
Embarrassing things happen to them and they take it like champs.
You are totally laughing at them, but not because you think they are losers for being the way they are, but because you recognize something familiar in yourself. It makes you feel better. You become proud of your widow’s peak, and laugh about one boob being bigger than the other.
Zooey Deschanel is infectious. If you don’t like her, you must not like ice cream, happy faces, unicorns, stickers and markers that smell like fruit.
If you don’t like Zooey Deschanel, you’ve never danced to a Spice Girls song sober or sang songs like, “I Will Survive” at Karaoke.
If you don’t like Zooey Deschanel, you don’t like cotton dresses, or vintage bicycles and you don’t like cotton candy and ponies.
*If you do feel some kind of way about cotton, I won’t hold it against you, I’m a little sensitive about the history of it in the U.S. myself…(tee hee).
Back to my rant.
If you don’t like Zooey Deschanel, you hate babies. And the smell of baby powder or clean linen turns your stomach.
If you don’t like Zooey Deschanel, you’d see a slug on your doorstep, run in your house and immediately break out the salt. You are already in the house, the worst is over. You’re just mean for going back…
If you don’t like Zooey Deschanel, you’d probably turn down a free turkey leg at a festival.
If you don’t like Zooey Deschanel, you hate sunshine and rainbows.
If you don’t like Zooey Deschanel, you probably had a jacked up child hood, have no imagination and need professional help to work our your issues.
So why am I acting like a groupie right now over this chick?
I guess it’s because I feel like I really relate to her.
She’s pretty in a regular girl way, but not so gorgeous she doesn’t seem approachable. She seems like someone you take A.P. English with. I feel like I could run into her at Trader Joe’s and she’d recommend some organic non-fat salad dressing and complement some piece of jewelry I have on.
*Disclaimer: I originally was going to write about the strange fad of well-dressed women on bicycles and then it morphed into this… lol. I may still revisit that topic.