Self Awareness and Sight
I told a friend earlier today that the most important thing that you can bring to a relationship with you that’s just as important as love and compassion and forgiveness and flexibility is self-awareness.
Folks have often said if you don’t love yourself, you can’t love anyone else. And it’s very, very true, but even in addition to that, you can’t really love others if you have a distorted and unrealistic view of who you are, what your strengths and your limitations are.
You have to know these things about yourself, so you can establish expectations… what the people you love can expect from you and how you react to things. That way, they can choose if they can deal with you or not.
When we really practice accurate self-awareness it’s like going to the eye doctor and finding out you need glasses. Sometimes, there’s stuff about yourself that you just can’t see. You have to get help from others, and you personally have to do what needs to be done to help you adjust for your deficiencies. You are always going to have blind spots if you don’t wear glasses, but at least you know exactly what they are and you adjust for them.
To me, that’s self-awareness in a neat little bow.
People who don’t want to be self-aware are like the folks who know they can’t see, but either don’t want to get glasses because it reminds them of a weakness or they are just stubborn, or they don’t realize just how beneficial they are.
A good example is the first time I wore my glasses, I was shocked that I could see so well. Shocked at how far I could look and at how small the writing was I was able to read on signs. But it also showed me how close I had to be to larger signs to see them well.
Self-awareness does the same thing. That’s why we have to work on this and be honest with ourselves and the people we love. It allows us to help us teach the ones we love how to love us better.