Things That Scare Grown Ass People
I was inspired by awesome fellow blogger from Choices, Voices and Sole. She recently discussed the most scary thing to single women who are dating and I thought it was so funny.
The struggle is real when you can’t zip up the back of a dress and you are running late. Missing your birth control pills and realizing you missed not one but two days, oh yes. You have quite the moment. So I want to not just talk about single women, but me as a grown person, things that scare me.
In no particular order.
1. Traffic cameras
2. Women who wear jeggings as pants and won’t even wear a long shirt or sweater to cover their butt.
3. Kid germs. (I haven’t built up an immunity to them. Being single puts me at greater risk when working parents with sick children share bathrooms and office supplies. Getting sick from them is the absolute worst.)
4. Being out of Nutella
5. The ice cream machine is not working
6. Getting medical test results back, whether you are healthy or not.
7. Stepping on a scale.
8. Blind dates.
9. IRS tax audits
10. Speaking in public
12. Poorly lit parking lots
13. Missed or late menstrual cycles
17. The words “We need to talk.”
18. Jury Duty
19. Being trapped in an elevator
20. Gas station restrooms
21. Hotel bed linens
22. Children allowed to make their own plates at buffets.
23. Being alone for the rest of your life
24. Online dating
25. People touching or biting food or taking a drink of something and offering it to you.
26. Bugs or rodents
27. Running out of gas or breaking down in a rough neighborhood.
28. Cell phone battery dying when you run out of gas or breakdown in a rough neighborhood.
29. Your final total in the checkout line at Target.
30. Sitting front row at a comedy show.
31. Your fat pants don’t fit any more.
32. Someone blew up the bathroom, and as you leave, another person greets you, and then smells the smell.
33. Chicken in a can.
34. DC tap water
35. Realizing you forgot to put on deodorant and you’ve already left the house.
36. Forgetting an important password.
37. Leaving your cell phone at home.
38. Traveling with a feeling that you forgot to turn off the stove, or you left your door unlocked.