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Look At Him, Now Look At Me…

Most of us have an overinflated ego when it comes to what we desire in a partner.

Should we settle? Heck no, but for all of the people who want very specific things or they want their partner to look a certain way, or have a certain level of intelligence or wealth or whatever, you need to break it down in the most simple way.

I use this as an example.

Say you are at a party of a mutual friend and your dream man/woman walks in.

Now you have an opportunity to chat with them and get them to find you at least interesting. What will you say to spark their interest?

Let’s help you out and say that this dream person already finds you physically attractive. But how do you really seal the deal? What do you have to say? What inspires you? What kinds of experiences have you had? What makes you happy? What are you good at? What do you care about?

Now let’s think about your dream person. What do you expect them to do for a living?

Now what do you do for a living? Do both of you enjoy what you do? Do you feel a sense of purpose? Are you both just chasing money?

What does that person look like? Are they well-dressed? Are they healthy and in good shape?

Hold up the mirror. Are you taking care of your body? Your hair, your skin? Do you feel good when you leave the house?

What is your dream person’s passions? What inspires them? What are their dreams and goals?

Now you. Do you have dreams and goals?

Does your dream person make things happen? Or does your dream person wait on others and just expect things to happen?

Do you make things happen?

Is your dream person a hard worker?

Are you a hard worker?

Does your dream person complain regularly?

Do you complain a lot?

Do you expect your dream person to be perfect everyday?

Can you be a perfect partner to your dream person everyday?

Will your dream person accept you for who you are on the days and nights you aren’t so dreamy?

And can you accept when your dream person acts like a nightmare sometimes?

You want your partner to be fiscally responsible, but are you?

Is your ideal person a loyal friend, honest, sympathetic?

Are you a loyal friend, honest, sympathetic?

You want a socially conscious and educated person, but what are you doing to expand your mind and how are you serving the community?

So my point is, the longer your list is for your potential partner, the longer your list needs your own self-improvement list needs to be.

One light cannot shine for two lights. But when two lights shine together the room is without a doubt brighter.

Everyone wants to be with someone they can be proud of. And for those of you swinging for the fences, if you met your ideal dream person today, be honest…

You as you are right now, could you even get their number?

And I love this song and I think it’s fitting. Mirrors. Justin Timberlake

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2 thoughts on “Look At Him, Now Look At Me…

  1. Ebony Rose on said:

    In my BEST Shug Avery voice….*Speak Lawd…..Speak Lawd, awww speak to me!* You just preached a good word!!! Let me lay hands on some folk by forwarding this link.

    **Passes collection plate and runs around the church**

    • You are toooo funny! It was on my heart. I was having a really good convo with one of my favorite people about folks talking about what they deserve. And how ridiculous it is, but we all do it. It really made me think about areas I need to improve in. I want my future man/husband to be proud of me and I know I want someone I can be proud of.

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