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The Heart Is Connected to the Stomach

I’ve been crapping since last night.

I don’t know if I have a stomach bug, or some emotional reaction generating in the crevices of my subconscious because I know, less than 20 miles away, my ex emeritus (yes, I made that up because he is my second to most recent ex, who is known as my ex-fiance) is getting hitched. Today.

I did not get a drunken phone call, and I don’t think he stopped by my house. If he did, I wasn’t there. I was on a date. So all is well.

The nuptials feel especially odd, because neither the bride or groom are from this area. They don’t live in this area, so yes. It feels like they went out of their way to come almost to my backyard to tie the knot.

In a previous post, I mentioned I was happy for him and proud of him.

Well today ish is real.

We texted a few days ago and I told him jokingly that I was conflicted.

I said I wasn’t sure whether to play Vesta’s  classic he ain’t marrying me song, “Congratulations” or “Gangsta Lean” by D.R.S., the 90s song that people blasted in the streets during a funeral procession for someone stolen too soon from this Earth because of a senseless act of violence.

I told him I was going to “tip a 40” to his memory. (Instead it will be a shot of Makers Mark) We had a good laugh.

Despite all of that, I’ve been crapping since last night.

My gastrointestinal situation is absurd right now. And you all know how I hate having to take a number two at work.

Could it really be related? I really am fine with this. I want to blame my pick three Applebees sampler, but I was crapping before I went out on my date. Wait! I had some crazy spicy Thai food for lunch! I may have to look into subconscious emotional eating, or being just plain greedy but otherwise…

Nothing is wrong with me! I’m not an emotional nutbag with residual feelings for someone I dated like 7 years ago! I just ate too many different types of food in one day!!

I really AM happy for him! Whoo hoo!

Now for the songs. D.R.S. first.

And for the dramatic mushy song. Vesta. Congratulations.

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