PSA: Fellas, MAN UP
I don’t know what’s going on today, but I read two articles that have just annoyed the crap out of me.
I told yall before that I’m hard on men, and they need to act like men. I’m not even trying to diss gay men (before anyone tries to start that mess), because I know gay men who handle their business, who work hard, who don’t complain and who are probably the most respectful and protective of women in their lives and honor and love those women, so this ain’t for them.
This applies to the punk ass men, I have been reading about today in this one article from phillymag.com.
It’s a lengthy read, but my goodness, it goes on and on about how young men these days aren’t motivated really and aren’t that responsible and how they are more than likely living at home with their parents and how women today are more likely to have their shit together than the men they have to choose from.
I’m just sick and tired.
I guess it didn’t help that a man approached me while eating my dinner alone the other night who was very awkward, and put himself down at least five times during our convo. For the icing on my cheesecake, when he asked me for my phone number and I said no, he asks me for a ride to the Metro. Like I didn’t just turn him down and reject him. But somehow, I’d give him a ride…um. Sure.
This is what we’ve come to.
What does this fabulous bachelor do for a living?
He took a deep breath, then said he was on his computer all day. But he actually schedules movers.
Fine, make an honest living. I’m not mad at that, but step your game up. Have some confidence and have some pride. (He told me I use big words, he doesn’t read, but he isn’t stupid.) Geez.
Because he said he said he does mixed martial arts, I decided to have another larger and more sane suitor walk me to my car once I closed my tab. I didn’t want to get attacked in the parking lot.
So back to these triflin ass men. Not all men are triflin, but we as a society are letting them slip, making excuses for them, doing everything for them and now we got a generation of hot ass messes, blaming the economy, blaming the rise of women in the workplace and everything else for their descent.
Um, you are descendants of cavemen. Have you ever seen those old school pics of the men who built skyscrapers eating lunch a gazillion feet in the air on just a beam??? They went and handled business and they weren’t going to complain about stupid stuff.
These dudes were eating lunch. On a beam. In the air! And you’re having a crisis because you aren’t working because you’re better than the jobs that are available, on your mom’s sofa, eating a sandwich she made for your pitiful ass, wearing clothes she probably washed for you (old funky, triflin, waste of flesh).
Those men aren’t better than you punk asses because of what they were able to physically do and their ability to provide and you aren’t better than those men because you have a college degree and/or can change diapers. Manhood has a lot of shades, but I still think there are some concrete things that cross race, income, culture.
You must be able to financially and emotionally take care of yourself and your family.
You must have something in you that compels you to protect and defend yourself and your family (be it physically or in addressing disrespect) even if it means getting your ass whooped as long as you stood up.
You should have pride in who you are.
Cavemen were living under the most ridiculous of circumstances, but they got out there and they made shit happen. Cavemen did not go back to their mother’s caves until they got on their feet. You don’t have to fight wild animals these days in order to survive. Cavemen had far fewer resources and luxuries than you broke ass college graduates still camped out at mom’s house because you still trying to pay back 100k in student loans and too prideful to take other jobs to help out.
So I go through my day, and another story crosses my path.
There are a bunch of punk ass fathers who are complaining about a Huggies diaper commercial that is making fun of fathers trying to change diapers.
The punk ass dads who claim they are so secure about being at home dads are the ones making the biggest fuss.
What on earth do you have to prove??? You aren’t a punk ass because you are at home taking care of your kids, that’s awesome, you rock.
You are a punk ass because you’ve decided to organize the rest of the punk asses to complain. You should have spent that time organizing a play group.
You are a punk ass because by creating this stir, you are telling people you are in fact insecure about being involved, hands on dads. I watched the video, and I didn’t see anything crazy. Most dads who are involved in their kids’ lives have changed diapers, most of which may not do it all the time.
And just because they are living the at home dad life, for most households, the majority of childhood duties are still being handled by women and will continue to be that way. There are dads who actually would be lost and going nuts if they had to handle their infant for two days without the aid of the mom. That’s just what it is.
Huggies punked out, pulled the ad and apologized. But that’s to be expected.
Their products are made specifically to take other people’s shit.
Maybe I’m an insensitive jerk, who is clinging to old school gender roles, yet wants to have her cake and eat it too, but damn fellas, these types of articles are becoming way too commonplace now.
Those men of the cavemen times, the Dark Ages, Slavery, and the Great Depression were just like you in a lot of ways, grappling with sense of self, wanting respect, feeling pressure.
Being a well-adjusted, non-whining ass contributor to society, your women and your kids is in your reach.